such a liitle thing

Today I went awanderin I went walking at the lake to do my daily walk. The Sky was overcast and for the hour and 20 minutes it promised to rain> I love a stormy sky and it is one of the reasons I love the plains...If texas could accomadatingly flood and kansas be scrunched into a mountain range it would be more perfect here than in california...But the plains are the steppes of AMerica and to me it calls to some ancient nomadic genes...Both sides of my family where steppe dwellers the european and the asian sides...I hate the Heat of summer but I love winter and I love it especially if spring and summer are wet. What is great about the lake is that with the democrats in control of the city...they have adopted a policy of allowing large swathes of the land in the park to return to native species of foliage...with this has come a return of many bird species and so the park is alive...With the abundance of rabbit this season, the wild cats are leaving the birds alone...For three years the plains have been in drought and now the lake is full...When the rains started to come and the lake filled up people began arriving to fish at night after work young men and couples were showing up...The geese are back and it is most beautiful, I am most thankful to the storm gods for their generosity. I was walking and I felt A great deal of happiness and as I walked and got my exercise...Out of the bottom of my brain came the thought thank Goddess I am fat....At that moment I had a appreciation for being a Fatty...Why would I have such a heretical thought??? What blasphemy is this???Why even young feminists would rather be oppressed than fat...Being fat proves I do not have the discipline to be truely radical and strong...Sorry I am obese and I cannot run the perequisite 10 miles a day that ran as young woman but I can bench-press 100 pounds and high-row 95 pounds and amaze the trainers at our gym when my husband runs me through my weight lifting routine...The equation of fat and weak by the slenderati is a funny one. When it comes to weight lifting I have never lifted at such high weight when thin. I might not be fast but I am not weak...I am very lucky that in my life I have lived fat, thin and fragile. I have been ill in thiness and in obesity....I am not brain dead I do wish to weigh less but I am no longer tormented by that wish...The tyranny of slenderness is gone and no I am not what society says is a normal weight(a living coat hanger for clothes size with hugemongous boobs)...Nor am I the healthy weight bigot size normal( you can weight as much as your grandmother did at 20, forgetting that the depression and wwII food scarcity had a great deal todo with the svelte figure) Which means you screwed unless you look like marilyn Monroe or Scarlett Johansson...The thing is that being slender is a terrible thing if you are like 98 percent of society and do not heave coal for a living and come from famine prone countries or your ancestors did. Fat is only bad now because it is a feature prominent to poor people...If tomorrow every fat person could genetically remove from themselves and their descendants the fat genes in them...Rich people and the middle class would be mainlining cool whip...Fatty porn would be enshrined in playboy and CAmeron Manheim and Kristy Alley would be fashion Icons.... The slenderati really do not have fat people interest at heart and Having been slenderati it is simply spite and jealousy that informs their action and beliefs...To say fat people donot care about their health is ludicrous I know many that refuse to smoke or quit smoking for reasons of health. I do not see amongst the slender such health motivation as many smoke to make not eating palatable...But the most Ironic is that the more of a pain in the ass you are to the fat ones the greater is the occurance of you becoming a Fatty as you age...Oh low is level and the pride of the formerly slender and now fat...But If one can put aside the self loathing and disgust in oneself that western society demands from fatsos... there are perks... Men do not hit on you continuely especially when they see the ring on your finger...(what ever made men think putting a ring on a finger of a woman would magically make her out of bounds and they think Harry Potter people are gullible)... no nasty remark and cat-calls walking down the street...No one wants to Fuck with a angry fat woman and Buffalo Bill withstanding serial killers are afraid of fat women...That is why they do not kill their obnoxious female relatives...So there is a joy to being fat and if you exercise diligently and wisely alot of physical ailments of fatness are negated.... Will the charming sexist bastards want to date you??? no!!! even if they are in to fatties image is all to them, but who cares that is another plus and a major one it prevents heartache and divorce and being taken to the cleaners Fat people of the world unite....No longer allow the Elitist Slenderati to control your happiness and self- love....And enjoy your meal...

internet puzzles

When I am on the internet and then off it for a while I am amazed at some new trick I am able to do...Of course the new trick usually has something to do with selling something and I can rarely ever repeat it if I wish to...But these little things to someone as illiterate as I am with a computer are what makes the internet seem like A large Chinese Puzzle box... It is part of the allure of it... I went to a function at the unitiarian church and I saw something there that I am beginning to see at the VA Hospital...Veterans that are usually the most conservative in faith and political beliefs are becoming radicalized...Unlike the sixties were liberals attacked them as conservatives exploited them ...Many soldiers are seeing that they have been recruted to fight a Holy war that they did not sign up for...Deep cynicism from people that do not publicly criticize authority >show they are unsettled ...Growing up in a country that has freedom of religion and a separation of church and state, then living and fighting in countries that are theocratic dictatorships has opened many eyes. I am much relieved and heartened by this turn as it means that the evangelizing of the military is losing strength under the reality of soldiers seeing eexactly what it is like for people to live in a Theocracy. In this way the fundies of america have lost momentum...I feel that the turning of America into a christian Theocracy is lost and I must say that I am ashamed that I doubted the common sense of the common man..The fundies have been waving a theocratic USA in front of the growing numbers of disenfranchised working class and middle classs as a cure to their socio-economic ills, like a carrot that is rotten in the inside but still looks fresh and nourishing....The Iraq WAr is a major blunder on their part as young working class and middle class men and women are returning to the U S in droves now dissaffected from religious absolutism...I believe that all things can be made into a force for good... Maybe this war with Iraq was necessary for americans to wake up and get over their flirting with religious Absolutism...I once had a Psych prof that stated before one can accept a new mode of behaving or belief, one would inevitably relapse in old patterns, behaviours and beliefs before growing and moving on healthier beliefs and habits... I view the growth of the Religious fundamentalism as that a relapse in immature and unhealthy belief in the divine ...All I can do is pray for the indigenous societies around the world that they survive the onslaught of the attention of these religious entities. merrie part from the hinterlands.